We’re famous now! People request to be reviewed! Unfortunately, we’ve been slacking on this front for a while, but we’re finally going to sit down and check these out. The first one’s really old.
	Also, it technically came out last year, but we’re just throwing it in. It’s part of a, uhh… series, and the last one came out in February.
	Evidently this band’s really old. They made some stuff at the turn of the millennium and they’re back by popular demand.
	It’s basically a bunch of fuzz with random noise and vocal sampling for almost an hour.
	Some of the tracks have a beat. The last one’s kind of cool, but it’s just like an Atari 2600 song overtly distorted with some hand claps thrown in.
	I was going to say track 6 is a cool one. It held my interest surprisingly long, almost half of all 8 minutes of it. The first two are my least favorites, still.
	Track six sucks. Moving on, there’s some great post punk from some other band. Phantomwise! Actually, I don’t like this either.
	I liked it quite a bit. It took a while because the singer sounds like he’s having a hard time, but there are other bands with similar vocals but usually sound stupid. Also, apparently Manila is the greatest density of people living over an entire city or something.
	The last two tracks do this thing where the guitar plays the same melody as the vocals. That’s some Barney bullshit right there.
	Musing to self: For some reason, guitar backing the vocal melody is one of Junkhead’s greatest peeves, but if that is true, I haven’t been able to figure out why he likes power pop…
	Normally they play chords and the vocal melody is different. You don’t even listen to power pop.
	Shots fired!
	You’re like Yosemite Sam lookin’ at all those bullet holes in your hat. Anyway, a lot of early blues rock does that more than power pop. Other early metal that was still blues influenced did that too, like Black Sabbath’s first two albums.
	Yeah, the last two songs of Phantomwise have some cool melodies, but you are right, the verses suffer.
	The second track has like, no melody. It’s this slow boring dirge where the singer sounds like he’s falling asleep.
	I like it. It might be my favorite of the night.
	That’s crazy.
	It’s very immature sounding and almost retarded, qualities I enjoy thoroughly.
	This is probably the least passionate music I’ve listened to in a long time. Totally phoned in and trying to fit a style and so missing the mark.
	Like, it tries too hard, then?
	I mean, it would be trying too hard if it tried at all?
	Like, it tries?
	It doesn’t.
	No extra credit for Encyclopedia Frown. Go back to the cramped Pearl of the Orient!
	So I mean, what do you like about it? Since I’m burying these poor gentlemen who requested this review.
	I do like the dragging apathy and uncooked writings. Really. It’s not indifference, it’s disconcern.
	I have no idea what that means. So my favorite’s Randy and the RN’s!
	Second time this year on BlahBlahMusic.com I think I like this release a little better.
	I think the vocals are pushed too far up in the mix, it’s a little too obviously cheap digital stuff. But the songs are just as good, a lot more aggressive and fun.
	There is a large amount of digital distortion. The first time I listened I was almost too appalled to give it a chance, but the poppyness is very appetizing.
	The sounds also kind of all over the place, like almost all the songs were recorded with totally different setups. I really like “Waiting for the Summer”, slow, loud, and pure pop is always a great thing.
	Case in point, guitar backed vocals.
	I was waiting for that. But y’know, sometimes people are good enough songwriters that they don’t suck. I think Randy (if that’s his real name) has a really good knack for hooks. “Break Yer Heart” he just sings along with the guitar the whole time, but its amazing pop-punk.
	I think the melody itself has to be sing-songy, otherwise it will sound like a double scoop of turd. RANDY SPIKE knows how to clean up a melody and add some spicy and sincere rhymes.
	Yeah, Randy never sounds like a pretentious twerp. He’s like a rock ‘n’ roll Everyman. It’s also refreshing he knows how to get in, make a statement, and get out. “Suicidal Highway” is less than two minutes and covers more ground than most supposed pop auteurs could ever muster.
	I would love to hear a whole succinct album from him. I do not know if he ever stuck to one style in the past.
	Sounds like he just does whatever the hell he wants.
	That must be where the magic is. Definitely one of my favorite musicians out of New York.
	I’m going to invite him to the Blah Blah Music Christmas bash.
	I can’t wait to find out about that.
	We’ll request a three hour version of “Kombucha Kids”.
	That’s the song that sounds like he recorded it three years ago in the back of a van while driving up the Rocky Mountains.
	That’s actually very similar to the Christmas bash’s setting.
	In a van tumbling sideways down the Rocky Mountains.

Ay-Hole:

Forsaken by Lidane Livering: 2/5 because it was mildly entertaining. Maybe I’m not cultured enough for it…
Phantomwise by Encyclopedia Frown: 3/5 because I wouldn’t turn it off if it came on.
Wish You Were Weird by Randy and The RN’s: 4/5 because it represents a crisp finished project with all of its un-sanded edges confidently sticking out.

Junkhead:

Forsaken by Lidane Livering: I give it a C-. There should have been more beats.
Phantomwise by Encyclopedia Frown: F. My washing machine sounds more interesting.
Wish You Were Weird by Randy and The RN’s: B+! This guy has legit talent. If our blog was read by millions of people, millions of people would love him.

Bandcamps:
Forsaken by Lidane Livering

Phantomwise by Encyclopedia Frown

Wish You Were Weird by Randy and The RN’s